Review: The One by Kiera Cass

Review: The One by Kiera Cass
Goodreads 
Release date: May 6th, 2014
Publisher: HarperTeen
Series: Yes, #3 in The Selection series
Source: Purchased
Length: 323 pages
Rating: Is this a real book?

 

The Selection changed the lives of thirty-five girls forever. And now, the time has come for one winner to be chosen.

America never dreamed she would find herself anywhere close to the crown—or to Prince Maxon's heart. But as the competition approaches its end and the threats outside the palace walls grow more vicious, America realizes just how much she stands to lose—and how hard she'll have to fight for the future she wants.

From the very first page of The Selection, this #1 New York Times bestselling series has captured readers' hearts and swept them away on a captivating journey... Now, in The One, Kiera Cass delivers a satisfying and unforgettable conclusion that will keep readers sighing over this electrifying fairy-tale long after the final page is turned.

The Selection changed the lives of thirty-five girls forever. And now, the time has come for one winner to be chosen.

America never dreamed she would find herself anywhere close to the crown—or to Prince Maxon's heart. But as the competition approaches its end and the threats outside the palace walls grow more vicious, America realizes just how much she stands to lose—and how hard she'll have to fight for the future she wants.

From the very first page of The Selection, this #1 New York Times bestselling series has captured readers' hearts and swept them away on a captivating journey... Now, in The One, Kiera Cass delivers a satisfying and unforgettable conclusion that will keep readers sighing over this electrifying fairy-tale long after the final page is turned.


The Selection | The Prince (The Selection #1.5) | The Elite (The Selection #2) | The Guard (The Selection 2.5)


Gillian: Hey, Gillian. How are you doing today? You look nice.

Gillian: You don't.

Gillian: We're the same person, so you kind of just insulted yourself.

Gillian: I need to talk to you about The One. You're the only one who understands me.

Gillian: Well, yeah, that's because I am y--

Gillian: I REALLY NEED TO TALK TO YOU CAN YOU PLEASE JUST FOCUS.

Gillian: Sorry. Proceed.

Gillian: So, that was a book. A book that happened.

Gillian: Was it? Was it, though? Or did you hallucinate ninety percent of what occurred? You did read it really late at night.

Gillian: This is a distinct possibility. Though even my fever dreams tie up loose plot threads better than... that.

Gillian: But you liked it! You laughed! I heard you!

Gillian: I laughed when a major character died.

Gillian: Okay, but you laughed.

Gillian: A major character's death that has nothing to do with the plot, is not born of the plot even though it so easily could have been, does not change the plot that follows or the main character in any way, and is executed SO POORLY that I could only guffaw in sadistic glee.

Gillian: I think you might be a very evil person.

Gillian: It was basically a sadness intermission. WE INTERRUPT THIS CORNY ROMANTIC SMOOCHERY TO BRING YOU SOME BREAKING SADNESS. America hardly felt sad at all, and I got the feeling this part of the book was meant to be seeeeped in grieeeeef, and yet there was no grief to be found. None. And heart trouble? HEART TROUBLE?! You kill off a major character in a series ender not through rebel shenanigans or anything, but HEART TROUBLE?!?!?!?!

Gillian: Don't even pretend you weren't devastated when SPOILER died at the end.

Gillian: Okay. That actually got me. FINALLY Kiera Cass writes an interesting character, and then she has to go and ruin everything with a COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS ENDING THAT COMES OUT OF NOWHERE WHEN THOSE STUPID REBELS DO THEIR STUPID REBEL THINGS AND IT MAKES NO DAMN SENSE AND OH MY GOD. I'm telling you. This wasn't real.

Gillian: But what about the ship! You like shipping.

Gillian: I do like shipping. I don't like when characters change their minds and hearts abruptly from one book to the next. I don't like it when a book has like fifteen cheesy declarations. I like where Cass meant to take her characters in terms of growth and epiphanies, but I cannot believe the way she took her characters there. One of the characters maintained a VERY STEADY position throughout both books, and poof! Book three, totes changes their mind. Because that happens.

Gillian: But you didn't want to stab America in this one. Or even Asspen! That's progress!

Gillian: Wow, you're right. I feel like I've grown as a human being. I no longer feel like committing fictional murder. America is no longer a waffling, waifish wattle-brain, and Asspen is less of a grunt grunt caveman, even though all of this growth occurs spontaneously in like the first chapter. BUT. THE. PLOT.

Gillian: Oh, the plot wasn't that bad...

Gillian: *stares*

Gillian: Okay. It was that bad.

Gillian: Hot. Freaking. Mess. There are two rebel groups: Northerners, who are Capital G Good, because they'e all YAY MONARCHY, and Southerners, who are Capital B BAD, because they want to shoot everybody and don't think the sun shines out of Maxon and America's royal behinds. Maxon and America are like, "Oh no! We can't let the bad rebels win!" And then things happen that have nothing to do with their actions. Asspen is somewhere in the background, being a noble ass. Marlee pops in for ONE SCENE and then pops right back out. Like um, thanks for visiting this supposedly epic series ender. Thanks for participating. Celeste the Bitch is abruptly and suddenly is humanized (which, actually, yay). The King continues to twirl his mustache, and the Queen continues to be the brainwashed victim of an abusive relationship who is canonized by every other character in the book.

Gillian: Okay, but that's not a plot.

Gillian: Don't be silly. Of course it is! There are romantical misunderstandings, pretty dresses, AMERICA IS A NOBLE HEEEEERO, Maxon what the fuck, ugh Asspen are you still here?, REBELS REBELS THE REBELSSSS!!!!, did that really happen how did that happen, the endddd.

Gillian: That... wait, is that a plot?

Gillian: No. It's not. And those god damn sketchily-assembled rebels and their stupid conflict. I don't want to talk about it.

Gillian: Do you want to talk about how accidentally sexist this is? And how SPOILER needs a girl he can protect and SPOILER needs a man to shield her and guide her? And how these are held to be very, very good things?

Gillian: No.

Gillian: Fair enough. Do you want to talk about how stereotypically "Asian" Elise was made out to be, and that her life philosophy is apparently "Honor to Us All", and how offensive it was when Kriss pitied her for it?

Gillian: No.

Gillian: Should we bring up how the Palace security must be run by blind gerbils because that's the only way those fucking rebels could manage to get inside the fucking buildings six times a chapter?

Gillian: No.

Gillian: Do you want to talk about how pointless (and predictable) it was that SPOILER and SPOILER were secretly Good Rebels even though nothing came of that information.

Gillian: No. 

Gillian: Well, we have to talk about something.

Gillian: No. I don't want to. You can't make me.

Gillian: It was your idea to talk in the first place!

Gillian: I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS ANYMORE.

Gillian: Should we talk about that cheesy ass epilogue?

Gillian: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA oh my god was that a glorious thing. A comedic masterpiece, that was.

Gillian: You don't have to be mean about it.

Gillian: I EARNED THE MEANNESS, BUDDY. I bought this with my MONEY.

Gillian: As opposed to buying it with your couch?

Gillian: Shut up. I have no brains left after that. This book did not fit with the rest. This book did not feel like the continuation of the "plot" set up in anemic book one and frustrating book two. I couldn't even get mad at this book because I didn't believe this book. Not one freaking word of it.

Gillian: Look, no one forced you to read this series.

Gillian: MAXON DID. STUPID MAXON AND YOUR STUPID ENDEARING LAMENESS. Why do I care so much about you? Why are you doing this to me? Why were you a flip-flopping mess in this book? Why are there plot holes so large you could drop a truck or a 747 or California through them?

Gillian: But Cass kind of did a Red Wedding thing there. That's... um, that's something, right?

Gillian: Fungus is something. Sunburns are something. That ending is something.

Gillian: That was way harsh, Tai.

Gillian: LOOK. Endings, particularly to series, need to COME FROM SOMETHING. They can't just randomly happen and then conveniently the people who need to die for there to be a HEA die and then somehow that magically fixes EVERYTHING and NO. When George R. R. Martin kills people, he does it to complicate the plot. Not to just have it happen. Not to resolve things. NOT AS AN ENDING. And then there's the fact that the action is SO CLUNKY, so unrealistic, so poorly described, that i just laughed laughed because it lasted so long and some people could free and others bled out under tables and America did nothing and oh god horrible action scenes are horrible.

Gillian: You should really breathe between rants.

Gillian: I CAN'T EVEN.

Gillian: Do you want to talk about the cliches?

Gillian: There was a cheesy death fakeout. There was a cheesy "Save yourself! Live and be happy!" scene. There was a cheesy letter written from beyond the grave full of wisdom and truth. It was an endless avalanche of cliche. America and Maxon are the only non-cardboard characters. The worldbuilding is nonsense. The writing is clunky, amateurish, and obvious. I need a drink. I need several drinks.

Gillian: Yes, but that's been true since the beginning, and yet you still read them all. Even those novellas.

Gillian: I once described this series as being like a deep-fried Oreo, and it's mostly still good. It sounds like a better idea than it is, it has this weirdly addicting, saccharine-sweet junk food quality, and it has zero nutritional value. But then this third book happens and it's... it's just... it's so bad I can't even find an accurate food metaphor. A tomato and marshmallow smoothie.

Gillian: I just vomited.

Gillian: An appropriate way to end this.